“Gordita” Culture Shock, by Cassie Olszewski

As a student studying psychology and a lover of travel, I am well aware that people from other cultures will interact differently than what I am used to in the United States. Unfortunately, I was not prepared for what I would encounter when living in Spain for five months. From differences in fashion to sleep schedules, I knew I would have to be open-minded and understanding when trying to embrace these differences for my time abroad. However, when my friend had invited me to dinner with his host mom in February, I was terrified. I do not speak much Spanish beyond “no hablo español” and “café con leche, por favor” so the thought of sitting at a dinner table with a woman who I was told was “opinionated”, “strong-willed”, and “loved to talk about politics” made me uncomfortable to say the least. In America, we tend to avoid confrontation by never talking about controversial topics (in person) and always trying to please the people around us rather than saying what is on our minds. Perhaps it is due to the individualistic ways on the United States; we all know we are different and chose to interact solely with goals in mind without having to know the specific values and beliefs of our companions. Therefore, if a conservative and liberal have to interact to get a job done, they would ignore their beliefs for the time being and focus on their work. Or if a wife asks her husband “does this make me look fat?” he would obviously say “of course not!” whether or not it was true. I instantly knew this dinner would be awkward, based on the cultural divide and language barrier, but I did not expect it to be the first thing that happened as I walk in the door.

My friend studies Spanish education and has been my translator for most of this trip but I do know enough words to make sense of what people are saying without knowing every detail. He said he had shown his host mom a photograph of me from the summer in shorts and a tank top. So when I walked in the door in “hibernation mode” wearing layers of all of my sweaters to keep warm, his host mom made the comment (in Spanish) “Oh, she looks larger in person!” To which my friend replied “Yeah, she is taller in person” but no, she did not mean “alta”. “No, ella es más grande” was said a few times and I know enough Spanish to understand she called me fat as soon as I walked in the door, my friend’s roommate even laughed uncomfortably. This experience was lighthearted and funny, though, and not meant as an insult. She then went on to give her opinion about how “chubby” or “gordita” women are the most attractive, make the best wives, and whatnot. So, it was intended as a compliment, not an insult like my American cultural ideals would lead me to believe. In the United States, that would probably be the most offensive thing to say to a young woman, but in Spain it turned into a compliment with a side of culture shock.