Family Dynamic in Spain vs. United States (New York City Sub-Culture) By Scarlyn Cuevas

While all young people have dependence on their parents before they fully become adults, during my time in Spain I noticed a significant difference between my relationship with my parents back home and the relationship the people in my host family have with one another. My personal family dynamic is specific to my family and cannot represent the family dynamic of the all families the United States. In addition, I am a first-generation U.S citizen as my parents are originally from the Dominican Republic, and that too has influenced my family dynamic. However, some staple aspects of it do stem from my New York City U.S sub-culture.

My earliest memory of helping my mother around the house was at 10 years old when I had to help my go grocery shopping and then put them away when we got home. Around the age of 12, I was able to prepare my own meals and I even helped take care of my 4-year-old sister at the time. Not too long after, I remember doing laundry for my whole house. In contrast, I noticed that in my host home, my 18-year old and 20-year old sisters do not help around the house when the mother is cleaning, and they do not help prepare any meals. What really stood out to be was the day I heard my 18-year old host sister ask her mother to make her bed. I was surprised because even if she did not clean the home, I still thought she cleaned her own room. Additionally, my mother never helps me with my homework, and I see that my host parents are always at the dinner table with my hose sister who is in high school helping her with her homework. Another thing that stood out to me was when I overheard my host mother making doctor’s appointments for her daughters. Back home, by the age of 16 I was making and attending my doctor’s appointments alone. I also find it interesting how every meal, at least in my host home, is eaten together as a family. I guess it has to do with the collectivistic culture of Spain, and how Spanish people may have a higher appreciation for the family unit. In the U.S, I never eat a meal with my family at the table, partly because we all have different schedules, and even if we are all in the house we do not necessarily eat the same meals. I think for Spain, the thing promotes the collectivistic culture is Siesta. The fact that most people have a time of the day that they know they will be able to spend at home and around family, acts as an motivator to spend time together.

Overall, I feel like Spain has a higher focus on the unit, instead of the individual. Growing up in the U.S I felt like there is a less emphasizes and appreciation for spending time with others and enjoying life, as there is a very go-getter mentality, where people are constantly trying to achieve monetary and material things.